Why do we have friends in our lives? Is it because we share a common bond and interest and love each other’s company? Is it because we grew up alone as an only child and the presence of friends give us a sense of belonging? What’s your reason for having friends?
There are many out there who collect friends so that they can make themselves look good and feel good. But only at the expense of their friends. In this scenario, the person who feels privileged and entitled only wants to be with friends who will give in to her whims.
In this environment, this person wants to control the “friends” around her. And as long as she is successful in doing so, she will make her friends feel very special. But this comes with a price. When her friends ignore her or do not include her in social gatherings, she throws a fit. This type of person has disregard for her friends’ boundaries.
Her friends, on the other had, just let her be because she isn’t the only friend they have. And besides, they aren’t really affected by this person because they’re able to say “no”.
But there will come a time when friendships will be tested. And most often than not, when friendships are tested, trust is thrown in the middle and wagered in the process. At the end of the test, friendships either become more solid or they crumble completely because trust had been broken.
When money is involved, things can get shady and friendships can go south immediately. Even guaranteeing someone else’s debt isn’t a very good idea. You don’t wanna be in the position. But you might have a friend in need that may be in deep trouble… so we try to help. We give the other person, a friend, the benefit of the doubt.
This is where you, as the friend in need, must make sure you do not break the other party’s trust. When money is involved, a lot of bad things can happen. If you are a borrower friend, make sure you pay the money back. And if you are a lender friend, make sure you are only party ways with money that you can assume, “will not come back to you anymore”. Once that is established, you wouldn’t really feel bad if the other person never pays you back.
Here Are a Four Tips to Not Waste Your Friends Away
Don’t Borrow Money
There are other places to borrow money from. Don’t borrow money from your friends because if you fail to pay them back, you run the risk of severing your friendship. An alternative is going to lending companies like Lending Club, PayOff, etc.
And if you’re really in dire straits and need to borrow muney from a friend, make sure you offer some sort of collateral.
Take the Time to Listen to Them
Your friends are human beings too. They experience life changes just like you. And while you sometimes feel that you’re a good listener, really make a conscious effort to show your friends that their important even when you don’t need anything from there.
Keep Your Word
Your word is your bond. If you collab on a plan, whether its an out of town trip or watching a movie on a Thursday night, Don’t just go off the grid and leave your friend out waiting for nothing. Instead, keep your word and honor what you and your friend had agreed upon. It’s not rocket science. If something comes up, let them know. Don’t keep your friends guessing. That’s never good!
Don’t Make Everything About You
Life doesn’t revolve around you. You have problems, they have problems too. You want your problems solved, so do your friends. Everybody is trying their best to make their lives better. And then you come along… you don’t care because their lives don’t affect yours. The worse you can be is to make everything about you.
There are a lot of ways to keep friendships forever. But there has to be boundaries and you, as a friend, should know where you should stand. Respecting your friends’ boundaries can keep your friendships alive until the day you die. Don’t violate your friends’ space, and this includes crossing any line.
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